Why Relationship Anxiety Feels So Intense There’s a question I hear often in counseling: “Why do I feel so anxious in my relationships?” For some, that anxiety shows up as overthinking. For others, it feels like a constant sense of uneasiness—like something is always just slightly off. And for many, it becomes especially intense when…
Dealing with emotional immaturity in relationships is one of the most draining experiences many people face. You try to have an honest conversation, but instead, things escalate. Defensiveness appears, blame gets shifted, and the real issue disappears beneath reaction and chaos. As a result, you walk away feeling exhausted, confused, or even questioning yourself. However,…
As America becomes steadily more diverse, inclusive, and secular, the fundamental reasons for some of our longstanding Christian traditions and beliefs have, for many, lost much of their meaning. There must be an answer Here are a few of what I call “anxiety reducers” that you can implement this Christmas season. Start small as you…
I’ve had conversations with countless people – even in my own family – who see Christians as hypocrites. Webster’s Dictionary defines the word “hypocrite” in these two ways: “Your words and actions don’t align” I’ve asked people who feel strongly that many people who call themselves “Christians” are just hypocrites this question: “What is it…
When was growing up in the 1960s and 70s, I had this false notion that Christians were weak and kinda powerless. Like they couldn’t argue or get angry or take on leadership because that would not reflect what it meant be be a Christian. Now that I’ve been a Christ-follower for over three decades, I’m…
I’m always amazed at how many motivational speakers, books, and conferences there are these days. “You can do it!” “There’s no I in team.” “The only thing holding you back from success is yourself.” And the list goes on and on. Through the lens of the world’s perspective, these all make perfect sense. Expectations —…
The term “narcissist” has practically become a household word in the past couple decades. Secular science and psychology tend to lump the term narcissist into a broader pool of mental disorders that includes the likes of ADD, Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Bipolar Disorder (BPD), Generalized Anxiety…
Do you struggle with anxiety when you think about April 15th lurking in your future? Much anxiety has its origins in fear of outcomes (or possible outcomes). As a result, a date like April 15th can evoke fear in many people. The date itself is pretty benign. But in the US, the fifteenth of April…
Over a decade ago I introduced what is referred to as the “Equal and Opposite Principle.” Similar to Sir Isaac Newton’s Third Law of Motion, the Equal and Opposite Principle is built on this statement: “For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.” sir isaac newton Simply said, proportional to the emotional pain…
I recognize some might disagree with my statement that anxiety is really an issue of control. And I’m sure there are many cases where an individual struggles with anxiety as a mental illness. But for the rest of us, I’m confident that at the heart of our anxiety is some form of control-related perspective. Just…