#42 IN MY SERIES OF POSTINGS DEDICATED TO SUMMARIZING A WONDERFUL BOOK ENTITLED “THE DUDE’S GUIDE TO MARRIAGE: TEN SKILLS EVERY HUSBAND MUST DEVELOP TO LOVE HIS WIFE WELL” BY DARRIN & AMIE PATRICK.
CONTINUED FROM MY POST ON SEPTEMBER 7, 2023
Submitting to other people is hard. Submitting to your spouse is even harder. One of the most painful verses in the Bible, which is located in a discussion about marriage, in Ephesians 5:21: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” It is one thing to know that you are to submit; it is quite another thing to know how and when to submit. But listen to Coach Jackson on its benefits:
“When a player surrrenders his self-interest for the greater good, his fullest gifts as an athlete are manifested. He’s not trying to force a shot, or do something that’s not in his repertoire of basketball moves, or impose his personality on the team. it’s funny — by playing within his natural abilities, he activates a higher potential beyond his abilities, a hiher potential for the team. It changes things for everybody.”Hall of Fame Basketball Coach, Phil Jackson
The Heart of Submission
Just as proper submission on a team leads to victory , so submission in marriage leads to success. Marriage is not a competition or a battle to be won by one side or the other. It is a complex partnership in which both spouses are respected, loved, hnoored, and given space to grow and flourish. Marriage is a place where we want our spouses to win more than we want it for ourselves. It’s a place where we learn to enjoy our spouses’ successes as much as our own and grieve their failures with compassion and empathy.
Principles Of Submission
You And Your Wife Are Equal Before God
One of the beautiful truths in the Bible is that men and women are of fequal value before God. This principle was a slap in the face to the chauvinistic, patriarchal cultures in which both the Old and the New Testaments were written. Simply put, men and women have equal dignity before God.
You And Your Wife Have Differing Roles
Spouses should submit to each others’ strengths. Your wife does some things better than you do. Maybe she is better at handling a crisis, planning events, or comforting a kid who has a scrape on his knee. Where she is strong, submit to here and follow. Where you are strong or have spiritual responsibility, lead.
Spouses Shoujld Submit To Each Other Regularly
I am a cheapskate. I inherited this from my parents. My favorite saying this realm is that “if it’s free, it’s for me.” Last year, Amie came home with the exciting news that our oldest child needed braces. The situation grew more exciting when she told me the braces would cost five grand. I immediately activated my inner bargain hunter. I found a friend of a friend who was an orthodontist and read my blog and listened to my sermons. I called the good doctor and asked if five grand seemed excessive. To my dismay, she said no. But later, she emailed me and offered to pay for everything regarding our daughter’s braces as a token of her gratefulness for my ministry to her. The only catch was that weer had to travel forty-five minutes away for teh appointments.
I declard the good news to my wife: “We are gong to save five grand, and our daughter will have movie-star-quality teeth.” to my surprise, she started to cry. She explained that she had done the research and chosen an orthodontist (not the free one) based on her schedule, as well as convenience and proximity. My argument was was money; hers was family. I realized that my wife is usually right when it comes to family. When I submit to her regularly in this area, we win. In this case, free was not fur us. We are five grand lighter, but our family health was worth the investment.
I’LL CONTINUE THIS ARTICLE IN UPCOMING BLOG POSTINGS.
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