Cancelling A Debt – Part 2

“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”  Matthew 18:35

Jesus mandate to forgive as we’ve been forgiven is pretty clear, especially in verse 35.  What makes it so difficult for us to forgive others?

When We Don’t Want to Forgive

Forgiveness is a choice of our will, not necessarily something we emotionally desire or feel.  We may not want to forgive, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t the right and best thing to do as a Christ-follower.  Unforgiveness and bitterness are some of the results of not Biblically dealing with past violations and unmet needs in our lives.  Nothing in our human nature will want to forgive people, especially when we believe they don’t deserve it.

God makes it clear in His word that in order to live in His will, we must forgive those who hurt us.

“If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you.  But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15 NLT).

Furthermore, when we choose unforgiveness, we stay bound to the pain, shame, and toxic effects of that violation.  That means we won’t be able to heal.  Forgiveness is the master key to unlock healing in a wounded heart!

I Can Forgive, But I Won’t Forget

We often hear others speak of how they may have forgiven someone for a harm they caused.  But they promise they won’t forget!  What causes this and how  do we get past this way of thinking?

Forgetting is a choice, not a lapse of memory.  Jesus forgot out sins.  But does that mean something about hid mind could not or did not hold on to the memory of our transgressions?  No, not at all.  Jesus chose to not remember our sins.  And this is exactly what He calls us as His followers to do.  To choose no not remember.

Layers of Forgiveness

True forgiveness occurs at three levels of our being that were affected by the hurt imposed by another human being:  Mind, Will, and Emotions.

• MIND:  “I choose to discipline my mind to no longer hold unforgiveness, resentment, or contempt agains the one who hurt me.”
• WILL:  “I choose to discipline my will to no longer justify my actions or decision that I might feel entitled to.”
• EMOTIONS:  “I choose to discipline my heart to no longer harbor the negative emotions related to this situation and person.”

In my next posting, I’ll discuss the benefits of forgiving fully at every layer of our being.

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