Shame-Based Family Roles

Within “dysfunctional” families, there are several roles that typically emerge.   No one signs up for these. Individuals just move into them during the course of life in this family. And usually in an attempt to emotionally survive the toxic environment. These roles are generally not healthy, but are, in a sense, necessary for survival.  Bradshaw […]

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Surrender – Part 3

Dependence in Relationships Some forms of dependence are appropriate.  For example, children are to be dependent on parents until adulthood.   In a similar way, husbands are to shepherd the needs of his wife and children.  So where do we draw the line?  How can we establish when healthy and authoritative dependence is in place, or […]

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Giving And Receiving Love

How many times have we tried to make an imbalanced relationship work?  How many efforts to change other people have failed?  In doing this, many of us bypassed the first two ingredients of God’s system of love: Putting God’s love first and loving ourselves.  Since that left us empty and with so many needs, when […]

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Faulty Love Systems

As we look at the heart of God and discover He is filled with grace, love, and kindness toward us, it should move us to desire to love and serve Him more.  Often this doesn’t happen because deep down, we are still blocked by faulty belief systems regarding our love.  When our earthly experience has […]

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Agape Love

Agape Love Is Jesus’ Love God intended for our lives to be immersed in agape love. The moment we were saved, or born again, the Holy Spirit indwelled us and we were connected with agape.  But for many of us, an experience of this type of love has never occurred.  Shame and past beliefs regarding […]

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Denial – Part 2

How Do I Identity Unmet Needs in My Life? Many times, our felt needs are far from actual needs.  We need the guidance of the Holy Spirit to show us the difference.  Let’s explore some of the areas where we are prone to experience wounding or brokenness caused by the neglect of legitimate needs: Genuine […]

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Denial – Part 1

Introduction The definition of denial is: “Refusal to admit the truth or reality of something; typically motivated by self-protection.” The lies of our past blind us to things that really do exist, while at the same time causing us to see things that aren’t there. The most difficult thing about recovery is seeing things as […]

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